How Can You Create An Amazing Relationship That Lasts?

How Can You Create An Amazing Relationship

That Lasts Long Term?

This information is from a video by one of my heroes Stefan from Project Life Mastery and his girlfriend Tatiana.

The new, particularly for me, was the idea about a relationship journal. I really love it! However, I absolutely agree that the most essential, the crucial things are shared vision and values.

1. You should have a vision for your relationship as a couple – to spend time and write it down together, to frame it for example on the wall and focus on it regularly. Based on that vision - to set goals together.

2. Lasting relationship is built upon shared values. If you don’t have the same values, you won’t have much in common, much to talk about. But if there is alignment with the values, you both grow simultaneously and this is so very important.

3. A relationship journal - Like I said I really love this idea! You check in each other on bi-weekly basis and write down the answers to certain questions like: What did you love about our relationship these weeks? What are you grateful for? How can I give you more?

You also rate on the scale from 0 to 10 your answers to questions based on the 6 human needs:

1. Certainty

2. Variety

3. Significance

4. Love

5. Growth

6. Contribution

Questions like:

1. How much certainty did you feel in our relationship these weeks?

2. How much variety, spice, excitement did you feel?

3. Did you feel we are growing as a couple?

Then you don’t write what other person wants to hear. You are completely honest. You think about it deeply and write the answer with your heart. The key is not to be reactive, not to blame your partner, but to take responsibility and to ask “What can I do to make you feel more certain?” “What can I do to give you more variety?”

You have mature conversation about that.

The key element is to catch things before they get too bad, to be aware. For instance, if variety is low, what can I do to bring it to the levels of 9 and 10? You ask the other person. You don’t guess.

The key is to be proactive, not reactive.

This is the video part about the relationship journal:

and here is a link to the whole video if you want to see it (I highly recommend it ;-)

#stefan